Introduction
Every child has the power to succeed in school and in life and every parent; family
member and caregiver can help. The question is: How can we help our children
succeed? The answer comes from a combination of common sense and research about
how children learn and about how to prepare them to learn.
We know, for example, that children tend to do the same things as their parents
do. What we say and do in our daily lives can help them to develop positive attitudes
toward school and learning and to build confidence in themselves as learners. Showing
our children that we both value education and use it in our daily lives provides
them with powerful models and contributes greatly to their success in school.
As our children’s first and most important teacher, it’s important that all parents
build and keep strong ties to our children’s schools. When parents and families
are involved in their children’s schools, the children do better and have better
feelings about going to school. We help our children to succeed by working with
teachers to make sure that they provide curricula and use teaching methods that
are based on strong scientific evidence about what works best in helping students
to learn.
The purpose of this booklet is to make available to you information that you can
use to help your child to succeed in school. The booklet includes:
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information about things that you can do at home to contribute to your child’s
school success;
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activities that you can use to help your child acquire the skills to succeed in
school;
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answers to often-asked questions about how to work with teachers and schools;
and
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tips on how to help your child with test taking.
The Basics
If you think about it, although school is very important, it does not really take
up very much of a child’s time. In the United States, the school year averages 180
days; in other nations, the school year can last up to 240 days and students are
often in school more hours per day than American students. Clearly, the hours and
days that a child is not in school are important for learning, too. Here
are some things that you can do to help your child to make the most of that time:
Encourage Your Child to Read
Helping your child become a reader is the single most important thing that you can
do to help the child to succeed in school—and in life. The importance of reading
simply can’t be overstated. Reading helps children in all school subjects. More
important, it is the key to lifelong learning. Here are some tips on how to help
your child become a reader.
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Start early. When your child is still a baby, reading aloud to him* should
become part of your daily routine. At first, read for no more than a few minutes
at a time, several times a day. As your child grows older, you should be able to
tell if he wants you to read for longer periods. As you read, talk with your
child. Encourage him to ask questions and to talk about the story. Ask him to
predict what will come next. When your child begins to read, ask him to read to
you from books or magazines that he enjoys.
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Make sure that your home has lots of reading materials that are appropriate for
your child. Keep books, magazines and newspapers in the house. Reading materials
don’t have to be new or expensive. You often can find good books and magazines
for your child at yard or library sales. Ask family members and friends to
consider giving your child books and magazine subscriptions as gifts for
birthdays or other special occasions. Set aside quiet time for family reading.
Some families even enjoy reading aloud to each other, with each family member
choosing a book, story, poem or article to read to the others.
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Show that you value reading. Let your child see you reading for pleasure as well
as for performing your routine activities as an adult—reading letters and
recipes, directions and instructions, newspapers, computer screens and so forth.
Go with her to the library and check out books for yourself. When your child
sees that reading is important to you, she is likely to decide that it’s
important to her, too.
If you feel uncomfortable with your own reading ability or if you would like reading
help for yourself or other family members, check with your local librarian or with
your child’s school about literacy programs in your community.
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Get help for your child if he has a reading problem. When a child is having
reading difficulties, the reason might be simple to understand and deal with.
For example, your child might have trouble seeing and need glasses or he may
just need more help with reading skills. If you think that your child needs
extra help, ask his teachers about special services, such as after-school or
summer reading programs. Also ask teachers or your local librarian for names of
community organizations and local literacy volunteer groups that offer tutoring
services.
The good news is that no matter how long it takes; most children can
learn to read. Parents, teachers and other professionals can work together to
determine if a child has a learning disability or other problem and then provide
the right help as soon as possible. When a child gets such help, chances are
very good that she will develop the skills she needs to succeed in school and in
life. Nothing is more important than your support for your child as she goes
through school. Make sure she gets any extra help she needs as soon as possible
and always encourage her and praise her efforts.
For more information about reading, see the U.S. Department of Education
booklet, Helping Your Child Become a Reader, listed in the Resources
section, page <TK>.
Talk with Your Child
Talking and listening play major roles in children’s school success. It’s
through hearing parents and family members talk and through responding to that
talk that young children begin to pick up the language skills they will need if
they are to do well. For example, children who don’t hear a lot of talk and who
aren’t encouraged to talk themselves often have problems learning to read, which
can lead to other school problems. In addition, children who haven’t learned to
listen carefully often have trouble following directions and paying attention in
class.
Think of talking with your child as being like a tennis match with words—instead
of a ball—bouncing back and forth. Find time to talk any place, for example:
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As you walk with your child or ride with her in a car or on a bus, talk with her
about what she’s doing at school Ask her to tell you about a school assembly or
a field trip. Point out and talk about things that you see as you walk—funny
signs, new cars, and interesting people.
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As you shop in a store, talk with your child about prices, differences in brands
and how to pick out good vegetables and fruit. Give your child directions about
where to find certain items, then have him go get them.
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As you fix dinner, ask your child to help you follow the steps in a recipe. Talk
with him about what can happen if you miss a step or leave out an ingredient.
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As you fix a sink or repair a broken table, ask your child to hand you the tools
that you name. Talk with her about each step you take to complete the repair.
Tell her what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. Ask her for suggestions
about how you should do something.
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As you watch TV together, talk with your child about the programs. If you’re
watching one of her favorite programs, encourage her to tell you about the
background of the characters, which ones she likes and dislikes and who the
actors are. Compare the program to a program that you liked when you were her
age.
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As you read a book with your child, pause occasionally to talk to him about
what’s happening in the book. Help him to relate the events in the book to
events in his life: “Look at that tall building! Didn’t we see that when we were
in Chicago?” Ask him to tell in his own words what the book was about. Ask him
about new words in a book and help him to figure out what they mean.
It’s also important for you to show your child that you’re interested in what he
has to say. Demonstrate for him how to be a good listener:
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When your child talks to you, stop what you’re doing and pay attention. Look at
him and ask questions to let him know that you’ve heard what he said: “So when
are you going to help your granddad work on his car?”
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When your child tells you about something, occasionally repeat what he says to
let him know that you’re listening closely: “The school bus broke down twice!”
Monitor Homework
Let your child know that you think education is important and so homework has to
be done. Here are some ways to help your child with homework:
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Have a special place for your child to study. The homework area doesn’t have to
be fancy. A desk in the bedroom is nice, but for many children, the kitchen
table or a corner of the living room works just fine. The area should have good
lighting and it should be fairly quiet. Provide supplies and identify resources.
For starters, have available pencils, pens, erasers, writing paper and a
dictionary. Other supplies that might be helpful include a stapler, paper clips,
maps, a calculator, a pencil sharpener, tape, glue, paste, scissors, a ruler, a
calculator, index cards, a thesaurus and an almanac. If possible, keep these
items together in one place. If you can’t provide your child with needed
supplies, check with her teacher, school counselor or principal about possible
sources of assistance.
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Set a regular time for homework. Having a regular time to do homework helps
children to finish assignments. Of course, a good schedule depends in part on
your child’s age, as well as her specific needs. You’ll need to work with a
young child to develop a schedule. You should give your older child the
responsibility for making up a schedule independently—although you’ll want to
make sure that it’s a workable one. You may find it helpful to have her write
out her schedule and put it in a place where you’ll see it often, such as on the
refrigerator.
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Remove distractions. Turn off the TV and discourage your child from making and
receiving social telephone calls during homework time. (A call to a classmate
about an assignment, however, may be helpful.) If you live in a small or noisy
household, try having all family members take part in a quiet activity during
homework time. You may need to take a noisy toddler outside or into another room
to play. If distractions can’t be avoided, your child may want to complete
assignments in the local library.
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Don’t expect or demand perfection. When your child asks you to look at what
she’s done—from skating a figure 8 to finishing a math assignment—show interest
and praise her when she’s done something well. If you have criticisms or
suggestions, make them in a helpful way.
One final note: You may be reluctant to help your child with homework
because you feel that you don’t know the subject well enough or because you
don’t speak or read English as well as your child. But helping with homework
doesn’t mean doing the homework. It isn’t about solving the problems for
your child; it’s about supporting him to do his best. You may not know enough
about a subject such as calculus to help your child with a specific assignment,
but you can help nonetheless by showing that you are interested, helping him get
organized, providing a place the materials he needs to work, monitoring his work
to see that he completes it and praising his efforts.
For more information about homework, see the U.S. Department of Education
booklets, Helping Your Child with Homework and Homework Tips for
Parents, both listed in the Resources section, page <TK>.
Monitor TV Viewing and Video Game Playing
American children on average spend far more time watching TV or playing video
games than they do completing homework or other school-related activities. Here
are some suggestions for helping your child to use TV and video games wisely:
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Limit the time that you let your child watch TV. Too much television cuts into
important activities in a child’s life, such as reading, playing with friends
and talking with family members.
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Model good TV viewing habits. Remember that children often imitate their
parents’ behavior. Children who live in homes in which parents and other family
members12watch a lot of TV are likely to spend their time in the same
way. Children who live in homes in which parents and other family members have
“quiet” time away from the TV when they read (either alone to each other), talk
to each other, play games or engage in other activities tend to do the same.
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Watch TV with your child when you can. Talk with him about what you see. Answer
his questions. Try to point out the things in TV programs that are like your
child’s everyday life.
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When you can’t watch TV with your child, spot check to see what she’s watching.
Ask questions after the program ends. See what excites her and what troubles
her. Find out what she has learned and remembered.
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Go to the library and find books that explore the themes of the TV shows that
your child watches.
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Limit the amount of time your child spends playing video games. As with TV
programs, be aware of the games he likes to play and discuss his choices with
him.
Encourage Your Child to Use the Library
Libraries are places of learning and discovery for everyone. Helping your child
find out about libraries will set him on the road to being an independent
learner. Here are some suggestions for how to help:
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Introduce your child to the library as early as possible. Even when your child
is a toddler, take him along on weekly trips to the library. If you work during
the day or have other obligations, remember that many libraries are open in the
evening.
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If your child can print his name, it is likely that your library will issue him
a library card if you will also sign for him. See that your child gets his
own library card as soon as possible so that he can check out his own books.
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When you take your child to the library, introduce yourself and your child to
the librarian. Ask the librarian to show you around the library and tell you
about the services it has to offer. For example, in addition to all kinds of
books, your library most likely will have magazines of interest to both your
child and to you. It will likely have newspapers from many different places.
Most libraries also have tapes and CDs of books, music CDs and tapes, movies on
video and on DVD and many more resources. Your library also might have books in
languages other than English or programs to help adults improve their English
reading skills.
Ask the librarian to tell your child about special programs that he might
participate in, such as summer reading programs and book clubs and about
services such as homework help.
—Library materials must be handled carefully.
—Materials that are borrowed must be returned on time. Your child needs to learn
how long she can keep materials and what the fine will be for materials that are
returned late.
—All library users need to be considerate of each other. Shouting, running and
being disruptive are not appropriate library behaviors.
Help Your Child Learn to Use the Internet Properly and Effectively
The Internet/World Wide WEB—a network of computers that connects people and
information all around the world—has become an important part of how we learn
and of how we interact with others. For children to succeed today, they must be
able to use the Internet. Here are some suggestions for helping your child learn
to do so properly and effectively:
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Spend time online with your child. If you don’t have a computer at home, ask
your librarian if the library has computers that you and your child may use.
Learn along with your child. If you’re not familiar with computers or with the
Internet, ask the librarian if and when someone is available at the library to
help you and your child learn together to use them. If your child knows about
computers, let her teach you. Ask her to explain what she is doing and why. Ask
her to show you her favorite Websites and to tell you what she likes about them.
This will help her build self-confidence and pride in her abilities.
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Help your child to locate appropriate Internet Web sites. At the same time, make
sure that she understands what you think are appropriate Web sites for her to
visit. Point her in the direction of sites that can help her with homework or
that relate to her interests.
Pay attention to any games she might download or copy from the Internet. Some
games are violent or contain sexual or other content that is inappropriate for
children. Resources such as
GetNetWise (http://www.getnetwise.org/), a public service provided by
Internet corporations and public interest groups can help you to make good Web
site choices and give you more information about Internet use.
You might consider using “filters” to block your child from accessing sites that
maybe inappropriate. These filters include software programs that you can
install on your computer. In addition, many Internet service providers offer
filters (often for free) that restrict the sites that children can visit. Of
course, these filters are not always completely effective—and children can find
ways around them. The best safeguard is your supervision and involvement.
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Monitor the amount of time that your child spends online. Internet surfing can
be just as time consuming as watching TV. Don’t let it take over your child’s
life. Have her place a clock near the computer and keep track of how much time
she is spending online. Remember, many commercial online services charge for the
amount of time the service is used. These charges can mount up quickly!
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Teach your child rules for using the Internet safely. Let him know that he
should never do the following:
—tell anyone—including his friends—his computer password;
—use bad language or send cruel, threatening or untrue e-mail messages;
—give out any personal information, including his name or the names of family
members, home address, phone number, age, school name; or
—arrange to meet a stranger that he has “talked” within an online “chat room.”
For more information about helping your child use the Internet, see the
following publications, listed in the Resources section, page <TK>:
American Library Association, The Librarian’s Guide to Cyberspace for
Parents and Kids; Children’s Partnership, The Parents’ Guide to the
Information Superhighway.
Encourage Your Child to Be Responsible and to Work Independently
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Taking responsibility and working independently are important qualities for
school success. Here are some suggestions for helping your child to develop
these qualities:
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Establish rules. Every home needs reasonable rules that children know and can
depend on. Have your child help you to set rules, then make sure that you
enforce the rules consistently.
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Make it clear to your child that he has to take responsibility for what he does,
both at home and at school. For example, don’t automatically defend your child
if his teacher tells you that he is often late to class or is disruptive when he
is in class. Ask for his side of the story. If a charge is true, let him take
the consequences.
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Work with your child to develop a reasonable, consistent schedule of jobs to do
around the house. List them on a calendar. Younger children can help set the
table or put away their toys and clothes. Older children can help prepare meals
and clean up afterwards.
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Show your child how to break a job down into small steps, then to do the job one
step at a time. This works for everything—getting dressed, cleaning a room or
doing a big homework assignment.15ß Make your child responsible for
getting ready to go to school each morning—getting up on time, making sure that
he has everything he needs for the school day and so forth. If necessary, make a
checklist to help him remember what he has to do.
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Monitor what your child does after school, in the evenings and on weekends. If
you can’t be there when your child gets home, give her the responsibility of
checking in with you by phone to discuss her plans.
Encourage Active Learning
Children need active learning as well as quiet learning such as reading and
doing homework. Active learning involves asking and answering questions, solving
problems and exploring interests. Active learning also can take place when your
child plays sports, spends time with friends, acts in a school play, plays a
musical instrument or visits museums and bookstores.
To promote active learning, listen to your child’s ideas and respond to them.
Let him jump in with questions and opinions when you read books together. When
you encourage this type of give-and-take at home, your child’s participation and
interest in school is likely to increase.
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